Road House!

I have been adamant over the years about how much I loathe movie remakes. I mean, what the hell are they doing remaking Cabin Fever?  First of all the movie is barely 10 years old!  The first one, directed by Eli Roth, was pretty damn good.  If you haven’t seen it, a blood infection turns into a skin eating disease that kills everyone. As a big fan of Roth, I dug it.

There was even a sequel!  It came out in 2009!!  When I was writing for dvdfile.com, I wrote a review for Cabin Fever 2.  Which I hated more than you can possible know. It just gave up at the end. There’s a Simpsons episode that is in my top 5 favorites in which the children are lost Lord of the Flies style, and the ending is “so the children learned how to function as a society, and were rescued by, oh let’s say.. Moe.”  And it’s hilarious. When this type of “meh, who cares, let’s just end the movie” happens in a horror movie.. it’s terrible. If you want to see the worst ending of a movie I’ve EVER seen, see Cabin Fever 2!

Back to my point. I despise remakes. I am beside myself in anger about Ghostbusters. Depending on the day, I will convince myself that I won’t see it. As of today, I will not.

But this week came news of a Road House remake. Which, again got me upset because there’s no reason for it. Then I heard it was going to be starring Ronda Rousey.  And I was all in. Outside of a couple of wrestlers, and maybe Demarcus Cousins, there is no athlete in the world that I am more interested in seeing all the time than Rousey. And I don’t even really like UFC.

I am and have always been a boxing guy. I grew up on Mike Tyson‘s career. When he was coming up and earning his title shot. When he was the baddest man on the planet. A Tyson fight was a can’t miss spectacle.  That’s what Rousey fights have become. They last as long as Tyson fights and are just as entertaining. She is the most dominant athlete on the planet, and if she is going to take on Road House, I will absolutely put my hatred for all things remake to the side.  You bet your ass I am going to see the sh*t out this film.

Maybe they should replace Melissa McCarthy in Ghostbusters with Rousey.  She wouldn’t need a proton pack. She beat the ghosts into the traps.  That would probably get me to pay to see that pile of garbage.

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